For the current ideas I was looking to shoot back in my studio again. But this man requested a home shoot as he felt more comfortable in his home environment. This then placed me at a disadvantage as I did not know what options were available or what the lighting would be like. As I still do not have a distinct direction it complicated matters further…I had to work with very low light conditions, no clear ideas to follow as well as ensure the ‘model’ felt comfortable and involved.
To break us both in gently I captured some nice naked portraits of him within his home environment. One particular shot I am extremely happy with as it is very complimentary to the model as well as being an intriguing image. (Fig.1)
After this I proceeded to try for some subtle shots that capture the sensuality of skin in order to hint at a hidden repressed sexuality. I find this one particularly effective (Fig.2) as it has the marks of masculinity and is closely intimate…so much so that you are left to ponder whether it is such an innocent shot.
Unfortunately once the model had seen the images he commented “I want to share something quite special with you. I hate them all…”. Obviously this is the worst thing that could happen to a photographer as the intent is always that the subject will love the shots. After a little digging it transpires that he appears to be mourning the loss of his youth so as the images show him more-or-less true to his age he is horrified not to be the beautiful 20yr old any-more. He mentioned how difficult it is to age within gay culture, unless you fit a particular aesthetic which is portrayed within the gay media then you may as well give up the dating game. There is much truth in the joke that you are essentially dead after the age of 40.
A difficult shoot that leaves a bitter taste in the mouth of both photographer and model.